these are the days
There are some days, moments even, in which I find the need to capture it all, try to sear it into my brain. This is important because I find that if I can hold onto some impression of the holy moments, it can sometimes be enough to take me through the moments of struggle. We’ve had a lot of struggle lately, so it was so good for my soul to have a glimpse of heaven this weekend.
I love three day holiday weekends. I don’t know what it’s like for you, but sometimes weekends can be a challenge for me. I look forward to them, eager with anticipation, but often forget that much of my life doesn’t look any different on a weekend. It’s not like when I worked a regular 9-5 paying job. I still get up to my daily grind, but often with the help and companionship of my husband. This is great, usually, but it can take us a bit to find our stride in a weekend. There is a shift that takes place, from me running the household by myself, to me allowing room for him, too. It can be an odd bumping and jostling before we remember how to do this, find our rhythm again. That’s the beauty of the three-day -weekend. It allows us more grace in this process, more time to figure it out.
Because of all of this, my day of grace, moments of beauty and clarity, came Monday, day three of the weekend. It has been hot here in the Northeast. And humid. Summer has come early, and we weren’t ready. I have been scrambling to unearth our summer clothes, and surprised by the lack of correct sizes of shorts and t-shirts for the little ones. We found our blow-up baby pool in the basement, dug out our pump, pinched together swimsuits, and have taken up residence ankle deep in the brisk hose water. This year the Eldest is old enough to have such imaginative fun with water, and mud, and grass, and a few select containers. The Littlest is finally old enough to be left more on her own, and she is nothing if not an imitator of her older brother. My husband and I spent our morning sipping coffee together and actually having conversations, (grown up ones!) watching the kids play, long and hard. Glory.
Of course, hard play in the sun yields great naps for everyone, and we capped the day off with backwards dinner, dining on local ice cream from the farm/creamery near us. Of course no visit here is complete without giving our regards to the cows, the sheep, the pigs, the ducks, and the barn cats. Ice cream and a barnyard — does it get any better for little ones?
I sank into bed last night, knowing that I needed to tuck this day away in the creases of my mind. I need to be able to call upon this when I am losing my mind, listening to the tantrums and the whining, feeling stuck and alone. See, some days are better than others.